| Zombies schmombies, be afraid of the people . . . |
[Jun. 13th, 2007|10:52 pm] |
So, nothing to do today but stay home and enjoy living in the middle of the desert. Which has its advantages. One of them, that whole zombie thing? They're hanging somewhere else. Didn't even know about it until I signed on in late afternoon. Thought it was a joke. Checked the radio. Thought "Huh. This could be bad."
(oh, and for those noticing the irony, yeah, I get posting about the zombies when everyone else is doing it is a damn zombie-like thing to do, or at least sheep-like, which is something else I have never aspired to. Life is full of contradictions. I'll live. Or not, as the case may be.)
Went out to check on the animals. They were fine. As there seems to be a zombie animal problem in some places, which REALLY upsets me, went out into the desert in great distress and near tears. Saw a tortoise. It didn't appear particularly zombie like. Said hi. It looked at me for a minute, decided I was not gonna bother it, and went on its way. Those little dudes can move when they wanna. Also saw an early rising coyote, and went to check on a kit fox den about a mile away. Saw a few birds, too, and a bat. No zombie animals here. This? Good.
Started to knock on a neighbor's (okay, they're a good quarter mile away, but they're our second closest neighbors) door and see if they were alright, then it occurred to me that if they hadn't heard the news, a strange person (they may be our second closest neighbors, but we've never met) knocking on their door and asking "You guys having any problems with the zombies?" could result in me becoming a zombie sooner rather than later. And if they were zombies, did I really wanna knock on their door? And if they weren't zombies and had heard the news, what if they wanted to band together through the whole ordeal and we didn't like them? Decided instead to go back home, let the most beautiful and wondrous significant other know that the animals here, at least, were unaffected (and reassure her that they probably were elsewhere as well, cause as much as zombie animals bother me? they bother her a lot more.) We loaded up the Glocks, and she stayed here while I went to visit our other, closer neighbors. Already met them, and we live a peaceful coexistence w/the unspoken mutual understanding that we like each other fine as neighbors but will never be inviting each other over to dinner. Sadly, three of them had been injured in a zombie scrap earlier in the day. Whilst installing a septic tank for someone, of all things. I didn't like the way they looked or sounded. One of them actually speculated that maybe they could eat my brains first if they turned into zombies, and another one joked about their dogs feeding them instead of the other way around. This irritated me. I figured I'd do myself, them, and their dogs all a favor. Bam-bam-bam. Three shots, three bullet holes in three heads, three bodies on the ground, never to rise again (except in some non-zombie sense, maybe, who knows?) Damn, I'm a good shot at ultra close range. On the down side, this irritated those family members who were not already turning into zombies, and I had to kill them too. Then shot the dead bodies in the head, cause ya gotta be thorough in zombie situations. I paid attention during some of those movies. They had a huge freezer so I locked all the bodies in there. On the plus side, we now had at least the temporary use of a nice variety of vehicles, and they have an impressive array of firearms and ammo at their house. People who live in the middle of nowhere tend to be self-sufficient like that.
I shall add the rest of the story in a later edit.
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